The amount of influence one has influences how he thinks of himself. In other words, influence contributes to the level of self-esteem. For a person like him, egocentric by nature, turning slightly influential definitely raises his self-esteem. Only in a negative way. I still can't figure out how some people can take his words so seriously, without even a thought.
I lead a constipated life now. It is just like holding your breath for every two days and when the two days are over, you get to exhale for the longest moments. And the cycle goes on. Only after every cycle will I get a relieve, to breathe naturally. I really crave for another escapade. The last one seemed so freaking long ago, even though it was just barely three months ago.